It’s a kind of ritual for my mother and me to converse over a telecon at least thrice a week. We talk for ever-growing-longer duration, week after week. The ‘longest ever’ is yet to happen. Every other week we break our own world record that is set the previous time!
The other day, I was trying to get in touch with her. First tried her mobile. It was out of coverage area. Then I tried the land line. To my surprise, I could hear the bell ring in the first attempt itself. She being placed in the interior parts, the connectivity is as unpredictable as the weather forecast. I felt lucky and immediately raked my mind to find out which good deed of mine, since morning, might have blessed me with this happy surprise!
“Aai*, where were you? Your mobile is not reachable. The land line got connected in the first attempt but you took so long to pick up. I was wondering if the land line has slipped into coma yet again”, I said it all in one breath, the moment the line was picked up. Even though I have finished more than half of my life, I still secretly wish that mother should respond to me in instantaneously. When am I going to grow up, I wondered.
“I do answer prayers but sometimes it takes longer”, came the reply from the other end.
It definitely was not my mother. I grew suspicious. Thought someone was playing prank or may be a case of cross connection. Having nothing much to do, I decided to engage in some fun.
“Oh, is that God?”, I inquired.
“Yes, my child. I’m, Almighty”, replied a soothing voice.
“Then I am God’s mother here. For my sons name translates to God”, I replied winking. I knew my wink won’t be seen!
“Hahaha…agree. All ladies on Earth are motherly figures”, came a reply.
“Are you serious?”, I asked, contemplating that it’s the elder brother who might be at another end. But he was in other time zone. How can he be answering the call without me knowing his arrival, went the train of my thoughts.
“I am beyond all emotions, for I am God”, said the voice halting my thought train.
Instantly I took my mobile away from my ear to check the number that I had dialled. To my surprise my mobile screen had gone blank. ‘Battery must have run down’, I reflected in my mind.
“Your have 72% of battery. However, I am in a hurry”, came the sound from my phone.
“Is that really God? And if yes, are you here to tell me that today is my last day on Earth?”, I quizzed with much doubt.
“No, my child. Today I wished to talk to you”, assured the voice.
“But then I don’t have sufficient balance in my account for extra-terrestrial call. Don’t even know the tariff for that. Maybe it is costlier than international roaming”, I replied.
“It wont cost you a dime”
“Means, will it cost me some good Karma? Oh God, I was saving my good karma for some random acts of kindness to be showered on me”
“Like my posts on the blog going viral, milk kept for boiling not jumping out of the pot while I am on phone, children keeping their things back at their respective place without me burning my calories in shouting and this and that”
“It wont cost you anything”, assured God with a chuckle.
“Thank goodness! By the way which frequency do you use to communicate then?”
“It’s the frequency that matches the one inside you”
“But I was not thinking about you at all. I was thinking of my mother”. Saying that I bit my tongue. “I am sorry, I did not wish to hurt you, God”, I added.
“Do you talk to living being on other planets as well? Are there living beings on other planets? Can I some day go there? Which language do you use to speak with them?”, I asked a barrage of questions to turn His attention away from my undesigned remark.
“I understand the language of love”, replied the soothing voice. “Do you want anything from me?”, he added further.
Without wasting a moment, I said, “God please check plumbing and fittings at your end. Now a day, there is either a flood at one place and a drought at other. Also get the thermostat that controls the temperature of the world, checked and calibrated. For, at some places there is a wild fire and at some, people are dying of cold”
“You need some introspection as everything on my side is in perfect order”, said God with a hint of suggestion.
I was speechless. I thought of seeking some blessings but very next moment I heard…
“Hello. What’s wrong with you? What are you blabbering? Are you all right? Running high fever?” It was my mother!
The divine cross connection was over before I could realize. ‘Talking to mother is none less than divine’, I comforted myself. What’s your opinion?
*Aai means mother in Marathi
This post is a part of Write Over the Weekend, an initiative for Indian Bloggers by BlogAdda
Prompt for the week: Conversation With God